New Vision…New Blog

Well, I know I’ve taken several months off from blogging.  I’ve still been around on the Internet…keeping up with friends and family through Facebook.  However, I realized the other day, that I really do miss blogging.  I’ve determined it has served an important purpose for me…it’s even been a kind of therapy for me in the past.

Anyway, a lot of changes have occurred for my family and I in the last few months or so.  As a result, even though I want to get back to blogging, I sense that I need to start afresh.  This blog covers one season in my life, and so as I begin another phase, it seems appropriate to start a new blog.

I also believe that God has begun to show me a new direction and vision.  So from now on, I will be posting at: “Receive Your Sight” With this renewed vision, God is still supplying the daily provisions (and revisions) for this spiritual journey.

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“Where there is no vision, the people perish.” Prov. 29:18

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The Thing With Commitments…

…is that…there’s all this committing involved! 🙂
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Well, to those who know me personally, it may seem like I’ve taken a step back. You know, like I’ve started disappearing from some things and haven’t been as involved as I once was. Some friends, extended family, and fellow church members have started to notice this, and I have to agree that it’s true. (I may not be as present on the web either…less memes, daily stuff, and long-winded posts…maybe more quick posts, blurbs, and comments; on occasion.)

The good news is that it’s not because I’m severely depressed or anything. (I know there have been such times in which I’ve started slinking away from life because of fear, anxiety, stress, or great sadness.) However, my reasons now may still be difficult for others to understand, nonetheless. You see, lately, I’ve had to start making some tough choices, and it’s certainly not been easy nor fun…but necessary.

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I’ve never liked feeling like I’m letting others down, so I often try to take on more, whether I can handle it or not. I also, like many people, don’t like to admit when I can’t do it all! Some may look at me and think that I can do a lot more than I have been doing, and for me to cut back even more would seem ludicrous! However, this is truly one time in my life that I have to make a concerted effort to not let what others think, guide my actions. I do not state this in anger, but only in absolute truth, with love. It’s just the way it is.

I have made a commitment, and I know it’s time that I start giving it 100%! My husband and I made the decision 3 yrs. ago to home school, yet somehow along the way, I’ve lost focus. Home schooling was supposed to be a top priority, yet I’ve let so many other things sneak in and take precedent.

The simple truth is that home schooling my children, keeping a home, being a good wife, and taking care of my family takes EVERY little ounce of everything I’ve got! There’s just not a lot left over! It takes all the faith, perseverance, energy, discernment, wisdom, brain-power, brawn, will-power, motivation, love, courage, patience, resources, money and time that I have! No doubt about it…yep, EVERY BIT!! 🙂

Sooooo, that being the case, what am I to do? In order to do the very best job that I can, I HAVE to start letting some things go. I’ve at least got to back off from some other activities for a while to give this a real chance!

Some may think that the price is too high or too unfair, but that is not really for anyone else to judge. Actually, it’s also, no longer the way I see it anymore. This is a season of my life, and this is what I need to do for now to have success in homeschooling. (In fact, as the kids get older, the instruction time will actually have to increase.)

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Well, I don’t know, some may want more explanation, and some may want MUCH less! 🙂 Anyway, just know that I’m not depressed, I’m not mad, and I’m not giving up on life. No, the truth is, I’m actually just beginning to live…to live the life God has for me…one day at a time!

Changes for Next Year

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:11-13

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Usually around this time of year, I get all gung-ho and psyched about my plans for change. However, this go around, I’m just way too exhausted for all that (physically, emotionally, and mentally). So, what’s the good news? Well, since I’m already so drained, I simply cannot waste energy “spinning my wheels.” I need not try to get all hyped and pumped up about a dozen things…that I want to drastically change over night!! (Of course, that’s not such an effective approach anyway, huh?! ;-) )

However, I sense the Lord telling me that changes will come this new year…but not because of any personal pep rally concerning New Year’s Resolutions!! No, God has some changes that He wants to take place, but in His timing and in His way. I also realize that this new year, I’m not going to be focused on being BUSY, but instead on being fruitful and productive. (There IS a difference…In fact, it makes all the difference in the world!!)

Well, I don’t pretend to know what next year holds. I don’t have it all figured out. No elaborate plans. Can’t say I don’t even have some concerns, but I do know one thing. I don’t hold the future…God does…and that’s a good thing!

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Well, I’m home alone, and I’m off to grab my guitar. There’s a song I feel the need to sing. It’s called “I Know Who Holds Tomorrow.

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!! -D

I pray you have a year of true peace and joy!

“Just Around The River Bend…”

I can feel it–the anticipation is in the air. Good changes are coming my way. You’ve heard the saying “it’s darkest just before the dawn?” Well, my last post was about my most recent wilderness experience, and how I’ve been wandering around confused (with this heavy, dark cloud hanging over my head). However, it seems that almost as soon as I have finally admitted it (when things seem to have become the darkest), I suddenly feel a “turning point” coming. I’m finding a clearing in the thick, ominous forest, and I can scarcely see a path in the distance. A ray of sunshine is peeking through the heavy clouds.

No, it isn’t something that will answer all my prayers, fix all my problems, and suddenly make everything easy. However, I sense that my Lord is bringing about some changes that will bring back the hope, inspiration, and encouragement that I need to break free from this latest pit of despair. He always knows what I need and when I need it. He’s a good God, and He does care. He hasn’t left me alone in the wilderness to wander aimlessly. Instead, He’s been with me the whole time, and now He is pointing me toward the right path, which will put me back on track.

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Right now, I can’t even describe to you what He’s been doing in my life this week. In fact, I have to be somewhere early this morning, so I will have to explain more later in posts to follow. All I can say for now is that I thank and praise God for all He continues to do in my life and for never leaving me abandoned!

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If you are feeling alone and confused, please don’t despair. When you put your trust in Him, no matter how bad things may seem at the time, rest assured that He is always there. He is there and He is working in your life, even when you don’t see any evidence, just yet

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**Note: See last post: Where Am I?

My Beloved Coffee…

…wherefore art thou? Oh, how I do love thee. Let me count the ways. -D I love your freshly brewed smell in the mornings. I love your taste along with all your wonderful new creamer flavorings. I love the warmth of you–you soothe my sore throat in the morning, you comfort me, and you keep me warm on cold mornings. I love how you make me my morning headaches subside; make me feel more energized, alive, and focused…

However, alas, our relationship cannot go on the way it has. You see, the truth is, you’re just not good for me. You are not what I thought you were. I thought I knew you, but I really didn’t. You’ve had me fooled all this time…you really didn’t love me back, and you have not treated me well at all. All you’ve left me with is empty promises, high blood pressure, and a fast heart-beat! Therefore, I must bid you farewell…

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I know these ramblings of mine might sound silly, but they’re more accurate than one might care to think! I have been an avid coffee drinker for quite some time–the kind who is almost downright passionate about it. However, it’s just something I’ve become way too dependent on, and it’s certainly not doing me any favors! I’m flabbergasted that I find it even more difficult to limit or give up coffee than chocolate or sweets!

I have talked about just limiting it so-o-o-o many times, but somehow I either never get around to it, or I always find myself going back to consuming more and more! This time though, my doctor has helped me accept reality, by showing me just how much the caffeine has been affecting me. My consumption of coffee has not done wonders for my blood pressure, I can assure you. Yes, the truth is painful, but very much needed. I’m telling you, that even limiting to one small cup in the mornings has been brutal!

Just this morning, while experiencing the lovely caffeine withdrawal symptoms, I was thinking back to a post I wrote called “Ch-ch-ch-changes.” In that post, I had mentioned about how I need to rely on the Lord, and nothing else. I find it so easy to become dependent on these little “crutches” and vices. However, the Lord is trying to make me be honest with myself and pull me away from these things, before I let them pull me away from Him! The Holy Spirit is convicting my heart that anything I love or depend upon that much constitutes “sin.” Our Father loves us and knows what is best for us. Sin left unchecked only leads to bad things and interferes with our relationship with Him.

This morning I also found a couple comments and a new post made by my blogging friend, Gin (you may view here). She mentioned how the Lord had put that same “Ch-ch-ch-changes” message on her heart and mind this morning. I was humbled and thankful to God for this reiteration that I needed as much as anybody!

Thank you Lord for loving me enough to repeat Yourself! Please help me to rely on You more each day and to grow in Your love, patience, and wisdom…

Please help me to love You foremost and to let nothing come between us…not even a travel size mug of the best “Cup A Joe!”  -D

What Can Each Of Us Do…

…to make a difference today? Mrs. Joyce was 95 and the oldest member of our church, and each day her goal was “to do something nice for at least one person.” Oh, how we could make a difference in our world, if each of us would make that our motto each day, huh?

Over at “Arms Wide Open,” as part of the “Surely We Can Change Something” campaign, Aaron has a special post about a boy named Johnny. This young man is a bagger in a grocery store, and he has found a wonderful and unique way to touch the lives of people. Johnny has put a challenge before all of us…I hope we take it…

Check out this video–it will bless your heart:

http://www.stservicemovie.com/

Ch-ch-ch-changes…

You may like change…you may not…but one thing’s for sure–change is inevitable! Sometimes, I welcome and embrace it–I sure can get restless when I really need some change. However, there’s still that part of me that just wants to stay where I am. Well, I’m starting to realize that the truly important lesson is learning that “for everything, there is a season.” We don’t need to change, just for the sake of change, any more than we need to stand still, just because it feels comfortable!

So, anyway, if I’ve become a little more resistant to change, it may be partly because at times in my life, I would make sudden changes, just because… Sometimes, if things weren’t going well, I would sort of panic and attempt to “make a move” without really thinking it through or praying enough. Well, I now want to be a little more thoughtful in my approach–especially since I simply don’t have the energy anymore for too much senseless running around in circles!!

You know, I’m also realizing that often when trying to do things differently, it really is the little things that can make the biggest difference. In the past, when I’ve wanted to be more effective, improve in some way, etc., I tended to be too “heavy-handed” with the alterations. Instead of just tweaking something a little or making minor adjustments, I would want to do a complete overhaul!

So now, why all this focus on change?

Well, of course, this is the time of year when so many people are making their “New Year’s Resolutions.” A friend mentioned to me tonight that in more recent years, she has resolved not to make any more such resolutions because she has never kept any of them! I know exactly what she means, and I’m sure many of you do as well. In fact, a couple of days ago, when I was considering some of the alterations I wanted to make, I remember thinking I can’t stand the term “New Year’s Resolutions!” It’s just too daunting–I don’t like the phrase, and therefore I refuse to use it! Instead, I will call these:

Changes For A Better Life

1. Limit refined sugar, bread, heavy starches, etc.–my pancreas will thank me later. Also, not only might my waistline diminish a little, but my overall focus, energy, and stamina will be much better in the long-run!

2. Stay away from chocolate–I have often liked to think it’s like a friend, but it’s really not! I’m moody enough without it, and one piece is never enough! My loved ones who have to live with me will thank me eventually.

3. Watch what I say–Certain words may have recently become rationalized as acceptable alternatives to curse words. …But they’re really not so acceptable when my kids say them, are they?!

4. GET MOVING AGAIN!–I used to move–what happened?! I know that recliner looks so inviting, especially in the evenings, but…c’mon! O.k., so I don’t want to be running around frantically, missing out on down-time, quality time with the kids, etc. …But hey, get moving with the kids–get active with them–and do so on a regular basis!

5. Rely on God and His Word all the time–Not partially, not sometimes, not when it’s convenient! …And rely on Him instead of:

–myself, others, coffee, chocolate, sugar, medication, food, amount of sleep, looks, age, health, accomplishments, circumstances, finances, my abilities, my plans, my ideas, my agenda, my good intentions, etc., etc., etc.

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Well, there are other ideas for change swirling around in my head, but you know, maybe those 5 really are plenty for me to focus on right now! I must remember that I can’t tackle too many things all at once. I’m glad He’s still working on me, and I certainly know that the transformation will take a lifetime! Hey, change can be a little scary and difficult, but it can also be very exciting!